"I love the smell of napalm in the morning" - Apocalypse Now
"What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?" - Full Metal Jacket
"I was planning to hit the Pentagon next week" - TRON
"As long as there's, you know, sex and drugs, I can do without the rock and roll." - Spinal Tap
"What kind of man are you? I bring up comics and you're talking chicks and romance?" - Mallrats
"You know... the Nazis had pieces of flair. They made the Jews wear them" - Office Space
"Know your dope fiend! Your life may depend on it! You will not be able to see his eyes because of Tea-Shades, but his knuckles will be white from inner-tension and his pants will be crusted with semen from constantly jacking off when he can't find a rape victim. He will stagger and babble when questioned. He will not respect your badge. The Dope Fiend fears nothing. He will attack, for no reason, with every weapon at his command - including yours. BEWARE. Any officer apprehending a suspected marijuana addict should use all necessary force immediately. One stitch in time (on him) will usually save nine on you." - Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
Ethan Switch - Friday, June 15, 2007
Dip the 3D glasses in the sink and hand them fresh to the patrons. Watch as they find a speckle of water on their lenses and force themselves to smooth out the warp of plastic in the novelty size visors. To no avail of course, merely on there to spur them to wipe clean and wipe away the smear between them and the massive drop of a theatre screen otherwise known as the LG IMAX screen. Massive, and clearly the kind of screen all gamers should throw up on as they look for the super hidden secret whistle for that plumber from Brooklyn loves his fluting so.
Donald Sutherland, father of Keifer, and man with a hairy face to match an equally hairy voice. Perfect for narration on documentaries. And here, on the typical creatures wandering around times of the prehistoric, them goliaths which predate the mutant spawn over in Japan they call Godzilla. Here there be monsters known as dinosaurs. And in particular, with a name for Dinosaurs 3D: Giants of Patagonia, them roaming the wilds of Argentina.
Read the rest of Dinosaurs 3D: Giants of Patagonia - IMAX Sydney, Darling Harbour review
Belvedere Jehosophat - Wednesday, April 4, 2007
Directed by Tim Irwin, We Jam Econo is close to being one of the best band documentaries I’ve ever seen.
The documentary follows Mike Watt around as he reveals the story of the Minutemen and, in doing so, the story of punk rock – albeit, a type of punk rock that, by dint of its innovation, creativity, and refusal to be constrained by trends, is sadly in short supply these days. Watt shows himself to be an extremely passionate, intelligent, and equally principled individual, and his insight into both the band and the scene that he helped create is enlightening.
Read the rest of We Jam Econo: The Story of the Minutemen review
Ethan Switch - Friday, December 1, 2006
Outside a church stands a man with a microphone. Over on his left are three school boys, waiting for the bus and to hear anything that makes up the traffic that flows down the main road. Passersby pick up a pace when the squawk and squeak of the portable speaker system kicks in. Rambling and reeling off scripture, the gent diverts his attention toward the supposed mystic to his religion, "And what do they call that fiction writer who dreamt up Evolution? David? Robert? Chris?"
Nobody answers back from the comfort of their wait. Save for the man making the third session of the day for The Prestige. Starring a host of magic wielding plentiful with hands holding Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale, Michael Caine and Scarlett Johansson.
Read the rest of The Prestige review
Ethan Switch - Friday, August 11, 2006
Writer/director Rian Johnson rocks a very certain and exact world with this Brick he does.
Not the kind that junks up the jack on a new found crave in the white snow. More on that for the lesser of evils in playing to the hilt of a timbre and rhythm. Poetry with a smack of speed that spins the brain faster than a go on eating out a fraying extension cord.
Belvedere Jehosophat - Monday, July 24, 2006
Directed by guitarist Kristofer Steen, Refused Are Fucking Dead documents the last tour of Swedish hardcore punk band, Refused. Ground down by years of relentless touring and growing disillusionment within the band Refused Are Fucking Dead gives us an inside look into the ultimate implosion of Refused, presenting footage of the very last songs they played together.
The police pulling the plug on Refused just before they get to the part in "Rather Be Dead" where Dennis starts to sing, "But I'd rather be alive/rather be alive/rather be alive/rather be alive..." seems a fitting end, in a sad kind of way, to a band that managed to revitalise punk music, even if it was only for a second.
Read the rest of Refused Are Fucking Dead review
Ethan Switch - Friday, July 21, 2006
Shiny and a bit round on the outside, the attack at the cracks and the case for the DVD is not for those who fail to overcome the intricacies of a child proof bottle of prescription medicine. Even those sold at the back of the milk bar by the kid with a shin splint and a green eye patch.
A slight emboss on the tab hook opens the hinge right up to shower its single disc goodies within. Solid in design and construction, the plastic soon reveals that it is nothing more than a filthy liar. Or at least deceptive. All sounds of the fairies signifying a meager wealth of material for the medium.
Read the rest of Pet Shop Boys - I'm with Stupid DVD review
Ethan Switch - Sunday, July 2, 2006
Endless rides over concrete sleepers and time just melts into a piece of toast fallen on the buttered side. Eight into six and the taste for the end of days bites hard with no recourse for remorse. End all; expirations aplenty.
Opening release weekend for Superman Returns. Long years gone since Christopher Reeve and Margot Kidder last on the silver screen. Reeve since six feet under. Brandon Routh now in the titular role with Kate Bosworth as Lois Lane and Kevin Spacey as the ever maniacal and always ingenious Lex Luthor.
Read the rest of Superman Returns review
Ethan Switch - Friday, June 23, 2006
Five minutes to quickly turns to ten minutes over the hour. No sign of open doors and three women eat out one box of popcorn with their mouths open. Kernels hit the ground with as much frequency as the clicking and yapping of their jaws. Talk over the popcorn intensifies as they struggle to find the coordination to hit their mouths with their hands. A streaming sight of yellow explodo is done and all over with each encroaching patron.
Steadily the stream of people flapping about builds to line the foyer. Or whatever they call that area in front of the candy stand. Not everyone calls it a foyer.
Read the rest of Deep Sea 3D - IMAX Darling Harbour - 21/06/06 review
Ethan Switch - Sunday, March 26, 2006
Dead doors make for hard entry, the locks open in their own special way and the eyeballs inside the projection room appear only after a near incident leads to burning down some canisters. All accidents, all chance to waiver indemnity and a few minutes through the darkness in broad daylight back again at the start of the card.
Very much like the waffling of empty popcorn, the opening scenes of The Hills Have Eyes works a magic to pass over quickly. Quicker still when timing transport and breaking through gates makes for a tardy appointment.
Read the rest of The Hills Have Eyes - 2006 remake directed by Alexandre Aja review
Belvedere Jehosophat - Monday, September 26, 2005
Don't Let Our Youth Go To Waste 1987-1991 is a comprehensive double DVD set that aims to bring together all of Galaxie 500's recorded footage.
The first disc collects the four music videos – all directed by Sergio Huidor. These are all pretty similar in that they juxtapose the rather quiet, reflective music of Galaxie 500 against some very violent images. The video clips are actually very clever and certainly very arty.
Read the rest of Galaxie 500 - Don't Let Our Youth Go To Waste 1987-1991 review
Ethan Switch - Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Flapping through the shadows, various articles of street press and promotional flyers. Ready to slice open a finger susceptible thanks to dry skin being a prime surface for paper cuts. Moments before the actual screening of Murderball, a note to take leave and visit the confectionary station known as the Candy Shop. As with any other, oily sighs breathe on the seats.
Wheezing through the first half, a man in a row behind barely makes it out alive. The lungs collapsing on each moment of darkness cast from the silver screen in white. A woman who clicks on an empty drink bottle is quick to dash when psychotic eyes turn around and offer them the promise of Colorado boots in full force. Foil packaging of an obese nation crinkles loudly and drowns out the sound system of the cinema.
Read the rest of Murderball - Dendy Opera Quays review
Ethan Switch - Sunday, August 14, 2005
On the leather and fluoro bulbs wrapping shop fronts along Oxford Street in Paddington, twelve minutes downhill is far more on the up. Claims by the cinema itself suggest a leisurely pace, "The Palace Verona is a 12-minute walk from Museum Station, along scenic Oxford Street." With sidewalks and footpaths taking their faces to the construction and refurbishment, dead and quiet every night well before the midnight extension, minutes more are on the clock and twelve minutes is closer to twenty on a quick climb.
The Palace Academy Twin comes close to the Verona; one dirt clenching street separates the two. As the man behind the candy stand reveals, the Palace Academy Twin is not the Verona. Except, both choose to forgo the use of the box office and shell out tickets from the concessions stand. Tickets are almost optional; the usher is most certainly optional.
Read the rest of Turtles Can Fly - The Palace Verona Cinemas review
Ethan Switch - Friday, April 8, 2005
Vince McMahon wearing a tuxedo, complete with bow tie and cummerbund, provides a strange and scary visual. Expected at any moment is the sudden shredding, a tearing away of the penguin mock like a stripper at a hen's night. With his head popping out of the neck hold like a pimple set to squeeze, the fabric seems at pains to rein in the sides, stretched against his muscle-bound body. A feat possibly more than the very fibres are capable of doing so. Freakishly, at certain angles, it's almost as if his head and neck are shifting along the shoulder plane.
Anyway, here he is, sitting front and centre, saddle-style at times, on a stage surrounded by all sorts of memorabilia, trophies and trinkets from his wrestling organisation. Tonight's presentation, the history of Wrestlemanias I through to IX - 1985 to 1993 basically.
Read the rest of History of Wrestlemania I-IX (1985-1993) review
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