The Wax Conspiracy

Smith and Nguyen Kill Cats In Winter Heat

Ethan Switch - Wednesday, 9 July, 2003 - 11:36:25 - print it raw

Two feral cats ploughing each other viciously in sand, grass and heat were killed in a fit of passion recently.

The feline pair were discovered dead and locked in position underneath the new Whitepages for 2004. The owner, Sam Rockley, made the find when she tripped over the fur bloody scene trying to make her way into the house. "Ordinarily I would have noticed it walking up, but I heard the phone ringing and I just tried to get to it before they hung up"

The plastic-wrapped phonebooks had made their way deep into the skull of the topmost cat while the one on the ground suffered the double blow effect of being rammed not only from below but head one as well.

Rockley collapsed on her doorstep, succumbing to hyperventilation brought on from surveying and breathing in the situation.

It's believed that a careless and lackdastic distributor threw the phonebooks over the fence in a state of hurried pay. The resultant action caused the weighty tome to land atop the mating cats pinning them down and hard before they could react.

She missed her call.

 

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