Risotto challenge fails miserably, makes world record

Ethan Switch - Friday, 26 November, 2004 - 16:30:25 - print it raw

On noon, to a space of time two and/or a half hours later, freebodies and schoolchildren taken away from their desks, squatted and lay upon the short grass of First Fleet Park in Circular Quay, Sydney, to witness the mammoth feat of several named chefs cooking up a risotto storm in an above ground pool system. Stirred loose and fast with oar-sized paddles, the rice quickly turned risotto after the requisite maneuvres and ingredients were added.

International culinary author Gabriel Gate, along with other sorts of names the likes of Darren Simpson, Lyndey Milan and Simon Marnie, were on hand to cook their way, along with charity case CARE Australia into the Guiness World Record books. Presented on an opposing stage, Vanessa Amorosi performed a few songs followed by a host of folk type musicians. Stains on the grass were covered by the vomit induction of those who could not handle the taste of a gold dollar donation and those with a far fairer stomach than their beer swilling workmates would believe.

While the sanctioned record attempt was a resounding success, another subversive trial in human shepherding failed miserably upon arrival.

Despite the crowd that dawned upon the midday action, none of the homeless and vagrants ushered forth from their homes in the gutter. Disappointment was had as the nameless orchestrators, chanting for their heroes of social decline and disparity, were not rewarded with an expected sight. One that would have had an army of the free floaters smelling worse than the vomit on the grass in front of the small designated stage areas.

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